Thursday, May 22, 2008

st. pete's gone nuts. i'm heading to brooklyn.


okay, only for a week. but it's my first real vacation in two years! i will be flying out at the crack of dawn on saturday and returning on the 1st of june. i'll be staying in bushwick with my darling corinne. plus amanda who is moving home to the burg at the end of the week. there will be memorial day bbq's, pbr, loft partys, elicit drugs, whiskey, and tons of expensive vegan food. it is, brooklyn after all. if that doesn't work to put me in a better mood, i'll make out with columbia grad students at union pool who have complicated hair cuts and pay too much money for their jeans. this will surely put me in better spirits.


see, what has happened is the entire state of florida, and beyond, seems to have lost their mind. it's cool though, i made an appointment to see my shrink. not cause i'm crazy. cause everyone else is. every once in a while the drama and the heat kick in around the same time and the disparaged citizens of this fine city tend to make, what can only really be described as terrible decisions. then everyone talks about it. and then everyone gets all hot and bothered. and then everyone pretends like they don't, in fact, know intimate details about all the bad decisions that you, and everyone has made recently. this only complicates the situation and nothing really ever gets resolved. so, i'm peacing outta here for a few days in a what is possibly a vain attempt to clear the air.


also, i started to make flow charts of all my colleague's bad decisions; outlining where they went wrong and how often these situations could have been corrected. but a las, if you were doing it right, you probably wouldn't still be stuck in this lost cause of a town. and hey, even if you aren't still in this city, you likely have some residue of st. jude about you. sounds harsh, sure. but anyone from these parts, knows i speak the truth. anywho, while flow charts have proven to be in many ways therapeutic, they can be very daunting! some folks just make consistently terrible choices. not only is it difficult to outline this, it's depressing as well. at which point, you just gotta say, oh st. pete.


anyways, if you be in nyc in the coming week, hollar. you look like you need a drink.


also, corinne and i are cute. evidenced above.




Wednesday, May 7, 2008

heartbreak lends itself to ridiculous situations, apparently

last time a girlfriend of mine pushed through heartache, we ended up crashing the st. anthony's triathlon's afterparty on top of the pier and dancing up a storm to soulja boy. But, alas, that's another story for another time.

so, yesterday evening i sat on my kitchen floor sobbing for longer than i'd care to admit. which, you know, was kinda cool seeing as how for the past year i've not been able to cry. but after the novelty of it all wore off and after the ensuing hour of shit talking pasted, we sat out to do the only thing that one really can do in my situation. collect several of her favorite ladies and head over to st. pete beach for some good ol night swimming. nothing will ever get you over being sadfaced quicker than a 12 pack of yuengling and skinny dipping. no really, it's been proven.

there is absolutely nothing like standing on the edge of the world, naked with a cold beer in hand and pointing out the constellations. i saw phosphorescent phytoplankton for the first time last night. and for the first time since i put my sisters on planes heading to the far reaching corners of the land i realized that i was really, truly going to be okay. and that despite it all, i can still feel infinate.

there is also nothing like four girls walking into the bright headlights of a beach cop's vehicle, arms crossed over bear chests. that was the first time i've ever had to dress in front of a man in uniform. it was a night for firsts, apparently. note to self, attractive, wet topless girls can get away with just about anything. where's the Cop's camera crew when you need them. i just wish we hadn't dunked those beers into the gulf outta fear of the long arm of the law. i'm a good st. pete girl. we no like wasting beer.